50+ of the BEST Valentine’s Day Jokes for Kids -

As you may recall from past posts, I do a joke of the day in my classroom. Students enter their guess during morning work, and if they get it correct, they get a Laffy Taffy!

Valentine’s Day Jokes for Kiddos

What did one lightbulb say to another on Valentine’s Day? I love you watts and watts
What did one sheep say to another on Valentine’s Day? I love ewe!
What did the cucumber say to the pickle on Valentine’s Day?You mean a great dill to me!
What did the stamp say to the envelope on Valentine’s Day? I’m stuck on you!
Why is Valentine’s Day a great day for a party? Because you can party hearty!
What did the toast say to the strawberry jam? I love you berry much!
What did the slug write in his Valentine’s Day card? Be my Valen-slime!
Why didn’t the skeleton want to send Valentine’s Day cards? His heart wasn’t in it.
What did one piece of string say to another on Valentine’s Day?Be my Valen-twine!
What did one snake say to the other on Valentine’s day? Give me a little hiss!
What did one pea say to another on Valentine’s Day? Peas be my Valentine!
What do you call the world’s smallest Valentine?A valen-teeny!
What did one olive say to another?Olive you!
But wait, how did the sheep respond back? You’re not so baaaad yourself!
What did the painter say to their Valentine?I love you with all of my art!
What did the boat say to their Valentine? Let’s have a little row-mance
What did the octopus say on Valentine’s Day to his sweetheart? I want to hold your hand hand hand hand hand hand hand hand!
What did the butter say to the toast? You’re my butter half!
What two words have a thousand letters in them on Valentine’s Day? Post Office
What flowers give the most kisses on Valentine’s Day?Tu-lips!
What did the chef give to their Valentine? A hug and a quiche!
What did one squirrel say to the other squirrel on Valentine’s Day? I’m nuts about you!
What did one calculator say to another on Valentine’s Day? I can always count on you!
Why did the sheriff lock up his Valentine? She stole his heart!
What did one bee say to the other on Valentine’s Day? I love bee-ing with you, Valentine!
What kind of Valentine’s Day candy is never on time? Choc-LATE
How does cupid deliver Valentine’s all over the world? On an arrow-plane
What’s the most loving vegetable? Lettuce, because it has a heart
What did the salad say to the dressing on Valentine’s Day? Lettuce be Valentines!
What do you call two birds in love? Tweethearts!
What did one volcano say to the other on Valentine’s Day? I lava you!
Why do skunks love Valentine’s Day? They are very scent-imental animals!
What did one doughnut say to another on Valentine’s Day? I’m dough-nuts for you!
Where do hamburgers take their Valentine’s on a date? To the meatball
What did the bat say to his Valentine?You’re fun to hang around with!
What did one cat say to another on Valentine’s Day? You’re purrrr-fect for me Valentine!
What did one watermelon say to each other on Valentine’s Day? You’re one in a melon!
What is called when two fish fall in love? Guppy love
What would a mushroom tell their Valentine? I have so mushroom in my heart for you Valentine!
What did the owl say to their Valentine? Whoo could possibly be better than you?
What did the beet say to their Valentine? You make my heart beet faster!
What did the muffin tell their Valentine? You’re my stud-muffin!
What did the bear say to their Valentine? I love you beary-much!
What did the dry grape say to his wife? You’re the raisin I smile.
Why did the magnet stick on the refrigerator? He found her to be very attractive.
What did the tomato say to his girlfriend on Valentine’s Day? I love you from my head tomatoes.
What did the elephant say to his girlfriend? I love you a ton!
Who always has a date on Valentine’s Day? A calendar
How can you save money on Valentine’s Day? Become single
How did the telephone propse to his girlfriend on Valentine’s Day? He gave her a ring
What did the ghost say to his wife on Valentine’s Day? You look BOO-tiful!
What did the cactus say to their valentine on Valentine’s Day? I’m stuck on you!